nanowrimo.

The main focus of my past days have been writing my NaNoWriMo novel, which is pretty much sucking the life out of me. I find myself always thinking of ways to bend the plot or things to make my MC's personality more dimensional. I must say, writing a novel in a month isn't what's the challenge for me - killing my inner editor, who is screaming to go back a few chapters and look at that one dialogue or description - that's the challenge.
I don't know whether I'll be publishing it somewhere online for you guys to read. The answer is probably no, as I am quite protective over my writings and don't show them to any other than a few of my closest friends. Perhaps someday I'll let something see the daylight.
I realized this also counts as procrastinating, and I should probably get back to writing so I can go to sleep at human'o'clock.

Are you doing NaNo, or have you done it before? Share your opinions, experiences, tips etc. in the comments!

sk8ter

Penny cruiser board // Topshop cropped tee // Levi's cut-offs // Vans sneakers // HUF socks // Brian Lichtenberg Homiès beanie // Rimmel Kate Moss 01 lipstick // Butter London Lips & Tips nail polish

Another collage. Basically, I was bored. Also, I'm currently in the middle of nowhere. Might put together some kind of unseen mobile photos or other more personal stuff for you guys. Don't get bored, bear with me haha! 

I'm under a lot of pressure and stressing out at the moment due to a gig I'm playing next week. I'm nervous about playing material I've never played for anyone before and I'm also a bit rusty, as I haven't been in front of a crowd in way too long. Luckily, I've got the best support group of family and friends to pull me through all of this madness. 

T-shirts

Went into Ark in Cambridge yesterday not thinking I'd buy anything. I always go in there and most of the time I end up getting nothing, as the fit of the stuff is usually a bit dodgy on me. However, this time I spotted these two t-shirts. I've been wanting a cropped neon tie-dye t-shirt for ages now, and finally I found the perfect one! The Live Fast tee wasn't a planned purchase, I just saw it in the sale racks and thought it looked really cool. Can't wait for it to be t-shirt weather. I love t-shirts.
I also splurged on some cosmetics at boots, mac and lush. Post about that next week.

I'm off running now, have a lovely Sunday or whatever day it is when you read this!

sail.

16 days and counting.. Actually, I'm not counting days. I never was. I live in the moment.

A very good friend of mine celebrated her birthday yesterday.
"Don't leave to England", someone said to me, followed by a hug. Then it hit me.
It's happening.
It's real.

I've been really busy all summer, so I haven't really had time to think about anything. I feel like this wave of panic is slowly creeping on me, and I don't like it. I've never been the "nervous-type", but this time I feel really scared. I don't think I've ever been this frightened about anything. It's not that I'm scared of new environments, languages or new people. No. I'm scared about leaving everything I have here behind. I'm scared that if I leave, people might forget me. That my friends and I won't be as tight as we used to be when I come back. That there won't be a place for me here anymore. I know that this probably isn't the case, but hey, everyone's afraid of something.. right?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining at all! I'm so happy that I get to see England, explore a new culture and meet lots of new people. I'm excited about taking courses that I never imagined taking and maybe finding a new hobby. I'm looking forward to sitting in my new favorite cafe, drinking some really good coffee and enjoying a great book or drawing. I know that some of my friends would've wanted to take the same adventure that I'm about to, but didn't have the chance to do that.

This was me opening up to you, letting it all out(or at least some of it). I wanted to get this out of my system for a while at least. Thank you for reading, the next post won't be this moody. I promise.

and when I feel good I sing.

Hello everyone! I feel like I've been neglecting my blog a little. I've been busy making my setlist and enjoying the time I have left in Finland before my exchange year. I don't think I have properly announced that I'm going to be an exchange-student in England for 10 months. I'm equally excited and scared about it.

Above are some of my recent boughts.

Shirts - Carlings

Shoes - Vagabond

Hat     - Ponke's

Necklace - Accesorize

open flowers in the windy fields of this war-torn world.

Good music is good. Make sure to listen to that tune linked to this post. Probably one of my favorite mumford & sons songs.. They're all my favorites, haha!

Spent the day at Ruissalo taking pictures with Alice. Only a few of mine were good, as usual. I had a nice day, though, and I guess that's what matters.

so don't look ahead, never look ahead.

Feels like it's been a while since last time.. Sorry about that! I don't really have any excuse for not blogging. It's not lack of creativity, quite the opposite. I've been spending all the free-time I have while not working on painting, making music etc. Summer keeps me inspired, all though it's been really rainy and not too warm, so I don't know what kind of summer this is supposed to be. I think I'll be doing some sort of art-post very soon. Leave a comment below if you're interested in seeing some of my work and/or work in progress, will you?

Above are some pictures from my trip to Gdansk. I didn't take too many pictures there, which is kind of sad, as the city was very beautiful. We stayed in the center of the old city. All those colorful, old buildings made me fall in love with that town(as well as the cheap coffee..) I'll probably end up traveling there again sometime.

shock me like an electric eel.

So I've been back from Gdansk quite a while already, and I will be posting pictures from that trip soon. Right now I'm trying to decide what to wear for Ruisrock. I always find it hard to try and be convenient and comfy yet looking good at the same time. And the fact that it's going to be over 35 degrees C doesn't really help a lot...

A couple of days ago me and Minni had a little picnic at Turku Castle. It was lots of fun. I really needed to relax after work, and it felt nice to do something summery for once. There were tourists looking at us with weird face-expressions, too...

hearts a mess

Wow, today has been the busiest day ever...

I woke up and did my morning routine on time, but somehow I managed to miss the bus I usually take to school. I wasn't late though, I made it there on time. After school I had my hairdressers-appointment at a salon called Pop In. I hadn't been there before, so I was very nervous. The service was great, and I'm sure they're all good at what they do but GOD, HOW I HATE HATE HATE MY HAIR! Not the way I wanted it at all. It basically looks like I have very dark roots in blonde hair. Also, I was in a hurry to leave from there, since I had a job interview. The hairdresser didn't have time to make any nice haircut, which I'm kinda sad about. Anyways, the interview went well, I think. I also did some shopping today, I'll do a haul soon.

I am SHERLOCKED

I seriously need to do something with my hair, it's all over the place! It's growing so slowly too. I wanted long hair for summer, but it hasn't grown much at all... oh well, I'll just have to be patient. My regular hairdresser is on maternity-leave, so I'll have to try out something new(which scares the crap out of me). I'm super paranoid about hairdressers. There are like, over 100 hair-salons in Turku, but I've had bad experiences with a few. I kinda want to try a salon called "pop-in". 

A friend of mine is checking that one out pretty soon. I'll give it a shot, if her hair becomes nice! Photos taken yesterday. Me and Alice had a small photoshoot! 

PS. I just wanted to inform you, that I've been completely SHERLOCKED for the past few months... I just love everything about the BBC Sherlock series. It's thrilling and absolutely mind-blowing(and Benedict Cumberbatch happens to be awfully good-looking)

slam them in a doorway, put my face into the ground.

No more chocolate. No more coffee. Two of the things I enjoy in life. Sounds like a small deal but it's actually a pretty big one, since I can hardly function without my morning coffee. Oh well. I'll have to start drinking more water and eating more fruits... Why all this? Because my skin-condition is TERRIBLE.

It's been this way since the start of high school. I've heard it's in my genes, that everyone in my family has or still do suffer from bad skin, and with bad skin I mean acne-prone skin. I don't have the worst condition, but definitely not the best one either. My self-esteem is very low because of this. I never feel pretty. I never feel like makeup looks good on my face, or feel like my face looks good at all. People with smooth skin won't understand this, because they don't have to go through this. It really affects the way I feel about myself.

I find myself in the middle of a battle striving to become perfect. I wasn't really too self-conscious before I noticed my skin going worse and worse day by day. I just want this all to stop. I can't look in the mirror and smile anymore, or be natural around cameras. I'm sick of photoshopping and blurring all my pictures. I just want to be pretty and smooth-skinned like everyone else.

Sorry, had to get this of my chest. Thank you for reading, if you did.